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Last week, I was actually getting really down on myself because I feel like I haven’t progressed enough with the language and still feel like I am a green instead of almost going into my third transfer. It is extremely out of character for me to just throw myself out there and talk to people (especially strangers) when I am not confident in what I am saying! I emailed Mason, a friend that is serving a mission too, and has had similar experiences with having to learn a difficult foreign language. He gave me SUCH AMAZING advice of studying and working with my companion and just realizing that I don’t have to be perfect but to “JUST DO IT”! I don’t know - it was just really cool and motivating to get advice from someone that has gone through this and is going through it right now! So..Thanks Mace!!! His words “JUST DO IT” ran through my mind all week and 2 experiences in particular were successful thanks to that mindset.
ONE - We were in a program with this woman we tracted into and this was the 2nd time meeting with her. The first time, she said that her mother needs to hear our message so we set up to meet again at the end of the week. On Sunday, we came back and met with her and her mother. That day, I was exhausted from trying to understand everything at church and was super scared to mess up the spirit that my companion had done such a great job bringing into the lesson! But the “JUST DO IT” came into my mind during the lesson, and I began talking about the First Vision and recited Joseph Smith’s account and once I finished, I was about to keep talking about it and testify, but the mother ran out of the room crying! So much for “just doing it”! (just kidding!!) After a few minutes and after the daughter reassured us that she was just feeling it very deeply, the mother returned and you could see in her eyes that it hit home. I felt so happy that I could have contributed to that special moment!
TWO - At church, I have been so scared to go talk to people on my own because I am so scared to ask someone how their week was, and get an answer back full of words I do not know! So I usually walk around with my companion and have group conversations. I play it safe! haha! But not this time! As we were talking to some members, I saw - out of the corner of my eye- the less active woman we got to come back to church sitting by herself. The thought came into my mind - “go say Hi and talk to her!” At first, I chickened out and thought “ I can’t go have a conversation by myself! what if I don’t understand anything and it’s just painfully awkward?” But the “JUST DO IT” somehow took over and before I knew it, I was walking over towards her - ALL BY MYSELF and sat down with her. And guess what?! We had a great conversation about her week and her daughter and I understood everything! Yes, it may have only been 5-6 minutes, but being on my own in a conversation for that long, is pretty new to me! It was really exciting for me and made me even more motivated to keep working on the language so I can help more and more! This whole “going outside of your comfort zone” is so hard for me. I am so stubborn and afraid of failure! But I am ready to start moving forward! I have someone softly and patiently pushing me in that direction!
I just want to take a quick second to let you know that I have such a strong and firm testimony of prayer! Throughout my mission, I have had experiences with prayer, pretty much multiple times a day. Once I realized who’s at the other end of when I say my prayers and felt His presence and seen His hand in my life (magnified) I never hesitate to say a prayer! I am starting to lose count as to how many prayers I say a day! AM I a missionary yet? Haha!
Cute little shed in the backyard of the man in the story below.
so long story short… my companion and I were referred to this old man that needed his lawn mowed. So we took a member and while he trimmed the extremely long grass, my companion and I sat and tried to get a conversation going with the man about the gospel. Our attempt failed and he actually went inside, so we got the hint that he wasn’t interested. The grass was so long, the job actually took about 3 hours! So during that time, we took my camera out and were just looking at the pictures on my old memory card. I had taken my new one out, which had about 300 new pictures on it, and set it on my lap. After the 3 hours, we got up and left. That night, I went to go look at my camera and realized that my new memory card was missing!! Immediately, my mind went back to sitting on that bench in the old man’s backyard. My heart dropped and I wanted to run back and get it or try to find it right then and there! Unfortunately, it was too late, but my companion promised we could go back after our programs the next day (which wasn’t till around 5pm). If anyone knows me, I have a passion, you could say, for pictures. And to think that I had just lost, or could have possibly have lost, all those pictures and memories from being here in Hungary made me want to cry! I will admit, I did stay up a little extra worrying that it might rain or may have fallen some other place, etc….
But from the moment I realized it was gone, I said a prayer. Whenever my mind would start to worry about it, (which is more times that a normal person should) I would say a prayer. I had a constant prayer in my heart that my little card would be watched over and protected and that I would be able to find it! it seems like such a silly thing to pray so hard about, I know. But the next day, we went over to the exact place where I was sitting. I saw NO sign of the memory card. I looked all around the bench and started to get so sad that it was gone and that my prayers didn’t work. The old man said he would call us if he saw it, so I got up from off my hands and knees and in that moment, I prayed SO HARD in my head- just begged - “PLEASE!” and then looked at these plants that were at my feet and stuck my hand in and felt around and YOU’LL NEVER GUESS WHAT WAS IN THE PLANTS!? a snail….
AND MY MEMORY CARD!! I know my story is super cheesy and pathetic that I was so worried about pictures, but it has just been another experience that reaffirms that God is always there and is so aware of each and everyone of us and will answer our prayers, even if it is for the smallest thing!
This week was SZEGEDI NAPOK - (Szeged days) which meant there were festivals every single day! haha... it's a party over here!
- I am so thankful for wise friends with good advice!
- I am so thankful for courage and comfort we can receive from the Holy Ghost.
- I am so thankful I found my memory card so you guys can still see all of my pictures from the past few months!
- And most importantly, I am so incredibly thankful for my Father in Heaven and that I can always turn to Him, through prayer.
All my love,